Stop Being Addicted to “Sorry”

We need to talk about your favorite word.

No, not “love.”
Not even “fuck.”

I’m talking about “sorry.”

The little word your ego is absolutely addicted to.
The word that has turned into a reflex, a nervous tic, a cultural addiction.

You’re late? “Sorry.”
You forgot something? “Sorry.”
You didn’t even do anything wrong but someone looked at you funny? “Sorry.”

It’s like you’re casting a spell against yourself. And here’s the kicker: you are.

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The Etymology: From Pain to Regret

Let’s nerd out for a second.

 

• • Old English sārig → distressed, grieved, sorrowful.

• • Related to sār, meaning “sore” or “painful.”

• • Proto-Germanic sairiga- → painful, both physically and mentally.

• • Middle English gave us sory, still about pain and grief.

• • By the 19th century, “sorry” morphed into apology: “I’m sorry.”

So when you say “sorry,” what you’re really saying is:
“I am painful.”
“I am distressed.”
“I am full of sorrow.”

And you repeat it dozens of times a day.
Think that doesn’t leave a mark on your psyche? Think again. Yes, please do… because now… You know.

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The Addiction to Being Sorry

Some people (maybe you, maybe your friend who apologizes to chairs after bumping them) are literally addicted to sorry.

Here’s how it plays out:

 

1. 1. You fuck something up.

1. 1. You get to feel guilty.

1. 1. You get to say “sorry.”

1. 1. You get the sweet dopamine rush of temporary forgiveness.

It becomes a cycle:
Screw up → Apologize → Relief → Repeat.

Some even create situations to say sorry. Showing up late, “forgetting” deadlines, fumbling commitments… not because they want chaos, but because they crave the release of “sorry.”

It’s masochistic self-sabotage dressed up as politeness.

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Sorry vs. Responsibility

Here’s the real kicker: most of the time you’re not actually sorry.

You’re late because you didn’t plan well.
You forgot because you didn’t prioritize.
You bailed because you didn’t want to do it in the first place.

Instead of “sorry,” say the truth:

 

• • “Thank you for waiting, I was late.”

• • “My delay cost us time, I’ll make it right.”

• • “I didn’t prioritize this, and I will fix it.”

See the difference?
One casts a spell of weakness.
The other casts a spell of accountability.

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Words Are Spells

Language is magic. Literally. “Spelling.” Every word you say is coding your subconscious.

So when you’re tossing out “sorry” like confetti, you’re branding yourself as:

 

• • Weak.

• • In distress.

• • Full of sorrow.

Is that what you want tattooed on your identity?

Because here’s the truth:
Everything is a choice.
You don’t have to live in apology mode.
You can live in alignment mode.

Blow a tire on the way to work? You didn’t choose that. Say:

 

• • “Apologies for the delay, I blew up a tire.”

 But 99% of the time? You chose your action. Own it. Don’t spell yourself into a pit of sorrow.

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Final Slap:

Stop saying sorry for existing.
Stop being addicted to the mini high of self-punishment and fake forgiveness.
Stop spelling sorrow into your identity.

Instead, live so that “sorry” isn’t part of your vocabulary.
Move with intention.
Speak with accountability.
Expect the best, do your actual best, and fuck the rest.

Because “sorry” isn’t just a word.
It’s a curse you put on yourself every time you use it.

And you deserve better magic.